Applying A New Earth to Your Daily Life
When I first heard about Oprah's selection of Eckhart Tolle's book, A New Earth, I wasn't particularly enthused.
Most of Oprah's book club selections are over my head, confusing and I usually stop reading mid-book.
But when I heard about the free web classes online, this intrigued me to give A New Earth a try.
Instead of buying the paperback book, I bought the audio book so I could listen in the car, at home, etc.
I'll be honest. The first chapter put me to sleep. All this talk about ego, presence and stillness made no sense to me. But for some reason I wasn't ready to call it quits.
After I finished listening to chapter one, I downloaded the corresponding web class from Oprah's site.
I must say, it was really good to see Oprah and Eckhart explaining how to apply this information to our daily lives because I was in desperate need of an interpreter!
As I watched the webcast, suddenly things started making sense little by little.
Next, I listened to chapter two, then watched the corresponding web class. After completing that chapter, I developed a little system. I would take my morning walk and listen to a chapter. Then at night, I would watch the corresponding web class.
By the time I made it to chapter 8 I was a new woman. It wasn't that my life changed so much externally, but internally I felt refreshed and reformed.
And that's the whole point. Most people spend their lives looking for peace in external things - their mate, friends, clothes, cars, job, people's perceptions, etc.
But those things are all material and can change in an instant. So if your identity and happiness is tied up into them, what would you do if they were gone?
A New Earth teaches you how to go within and find the power inside you so you are no longer dependent upon form (extenal things) for your happiness.
In this article I will explain how it helped me. Hopefully you'll get something out of this too.
Staying Present - The Now
The main teaching of this book is staying present. So many people live acting through the pain of their past or anxiety about the future. There's this onslaught of inner chatter inside our heads...
I've got to get married by the time I'm 30.
If I just get that job, I'll be happy.
If I can get out of debt then I'll be free.
I've got to make enough money to buy that house.
If I lose weight then I'll be happy.
No man could ever love me.
We become identified with that never-ending voice inside our heads. So we begin to live life unconsciously. We actually become those negative thoughts.
We put enormous amount of stress and anxiety on ourselves because we see life as a means to an end. We're always trying to get something to make us feel better, whether that be a house, car, husband, job, etc.
We define our own worth or success in life by how much money we make, whether or not we're happily married, have enough money, etc. And unfortunately when "that thing" we want never comes, we feel we've failed.
Life becomes a never-ending journey of trying to obtain something in order to be happier or fulfilled.
In other words, we identify with form (our thoughts, material possessions, job and marital status, etc.) instead of being connected with our true inner being at this present moment.
In the book, Eckhart teaches you how to shut off all that inner chatter by learning how to become present. That doesn't mean to deny the fact you need money or want a good husband, job, etc. It also doesn't mean you shouldn't set goals and want to have nice things in life.
What it means is that you acknowledge or become aware of your thoughts -- staying present and recognize that you are not your job status or how much money you make. You are simply the awareness.
Yeah I know it sounds pretty deep, huh? You really should get the free webcast's from Oprah's site to watch along with reading the book because it helps interpret and show how to use the book to apply it to your own problems.
Removing The Labels
One problem I have is that I am very defensive. But I learned from reading this book that my definsiveness comes from having a very critical father who always found something wrong with everything. So as a child, I found myself defending everything I said to him.
This carried over into my adult life. I have a tendency to think everyone is attacking me, even when they may just be making a simple statement that wasn't really directed or about me.
This book taught me that I should not say "I am defensive." That's another wrong label I'm using to define myself.
So who am I?
I am simply the awareness that realizes the defensive statements I make, I'm not the label. And I realize that the defensiveness is just a brain pattern that developed from having a negative father.
When you start to become aware of the negative emotions and gradually learn to accept them, they have less power over you.
Suddenly you are not identifying yourself with those things (I am sad, I am depressed, I am defensive, etc.). You become more aware and more present. Over time, you begin to apply that presence in all areas of your life.
The Breath
Eckhart teaches that focusing on your breath is a great way to learn to live in the present. It shuts off your mind and if you do this long enough you begin to feel the aliveness and peace within your body.
When you make a habit of focusing on your breathing (some call it meditation), it reminds you to stay present. And when you are present, anxiety, fear, etc. ceases to exist.
You may not realize it, but anxiety and fear are the opposite of being present. Anxiety is fear of the future. Your mind is caught in a constant state of "What if XYZ happens?"
The best way to shut that off is to first become aware of what you're thinking and realize you are not those thoughts. Then take some time to focus on your breathing. As you continue to do this, the anxiety will lessen.
And the beauty of this is that it works for all emotions -anger, sadness, depression, you name it. The key is to practice it over and over again.
Don't Disown Your Feelings
One problem I always had was that I tried to disown my feelings. If I was feeling sad or depressed I would tell myself that I am not supposed to feel this way. This book taught me that whatever you resist persists. The more you resist feeling sad, the more sad you will feel.
Rather than wishing my feelings away, I learned to accept them and realize that they are only temporary. I am not a sad person, I am a person experiencing temporary sadness and this too shall pass.
So now, when I begin to feel sad or lonely, I just quiet my mind and really listen to the thoughts in my head without judging them or getting upset. The more I do this, the less those feelings affected me. I am also noticing that I feel sad less and less.
This was an eye-opening experience for me. It's human nature to want to wish away sadness or depression. But when you become aware of what you're feeling and just let it pass through you, it is much more freeing than trying to resist it.
This is because you have created a space between your thoughts and yourself. You are no longer identified with those wrong thoughts. You are simply the awareness that they exist.
Over time, the sadness cannot exist in your body because you are no longer afraid or identified with it.
Your Faith & This Book
A lot of Christians refuse to read or accept Tolle's teachings because they feel they interfere with their religious beliefs. I personally think what Eckhart teaches is perfectly aligned with Jesus and his teachings.
This book is not about teaching you how to worship another god or finding a replacement for God. It's about connecting with God through your own awareness and finding him in the present moment.
Many people never find God or inner peace because they can't shut off their inner chatter. They become a victim of their own negative thoughts.
I also used to think the only way to find God is to go to a church or get down on my knees and pray. This book has given me a whole new understanding about God. I now understand what it means to say "He lives inside me." But he can't live in you if your body is filled with worry and anxiety.
He (God) is the stillness, the peacefulness that is inside of all of us when we learn to to quiet our minds and stay present. And THAT's the essence of this book. What an amazing revelation.
Is Tolle's Book For You?
Some people aren't ready for this book because they are not willing to admit that they play a gigantic role in the situation they are in today. It's so easy to blame your husband, friend, cousin, lack of money, etc. on your situation.
Yet this book teaches you that it's not the situation. Eckhart makes a great point in the book. He explains that the situation is always neutral. It's how you respond or react to the situation. Your reactions and emotions are what bring about anxiety, turmoil, fear, anger etc. - not the situation.
You may not be ready to take yourself to this level yet, and that's OK. This book may not be for you right now. Perhaps 5 years from now you may be ready. But I definitely think it's worth trying it out to see if you can get something out of it. I sure did.